May 18th, 2024
by Matt Miofsky
by Matt Miofsky

Last weekend Jess and I watched as our oldest son, Caleb, graduated from Missouri State University in Springfield, MO. Tonight we will get to see our daughter, Carly, graduate from Webster Groves High School. It is a season of transitions, milestones, banquets, ceremonies and parties. We are just trying to keep up and savor every moment of it all. Part of graduating is receiving wisdom. Graduation speeches, notes in cards, and words of wisdom from others abound this time of year. No one asked me to give a speech (I am grateful really), but after hearing some of the speeches going around on social media, I thought I would share what I would have said to my kids (and yours) if I was invited to talk.
Congratulations. This is a big moment, whether it feels like it or not. Big because it is a threshold from one stage of life to another. If you are feeling a little all over the place, that is ok. You are saying goodbye and hello at the same time. Grieving something ending, celebrating something accomplished, and processing the excitement, anxiety, and perhaps fear over what is coming up. It is a lot.
You have probably seen a lot of speeches going around on Snapchat or TikTok, like the one from the Kansas City Chiefs player telling women that their job is to stay home and have kids. There are a lot of people who think this way, not just about women, but about a lot of things. The world is always changing, and it can be scary and unsettling. Some deal with this by wishing they could go back in time to some earlier way of life. You might even be tempted at times to believe this, but I caution against it. The answers for your life don’t reside in the past but in the future. No one ever moved forward by going backwards. There is wisdom in old ideas, but you must figure out how to apply them to a new and changing world. Also, the past was not near as lovely as folks make it out to be. You can waste a lot of time resisting change. Instead, keep moving forward and engage the evolving world with courage, openness, and humility. Don’t be afraid.
You will discover if you haven’t already that a lot of people want to know what you are doing next. Your future plans matter, and I am proud of what you are working towards. But the most important part of life is not what you are going to do but who you are going to become. The answers to that question won’t be found in a classroom or a job promotion. You have to search differently for those answers, and find wise people to help you. This is the stuff Jesus cares most about, and he can help. Trust him and listen. The world will reduce your value to what you achieve, earn, and produce. Don’t buy into that idea. Life is about more than that.
When it comes to money, be careful here. You need it. Be smart. Save wisely, spend intentionally, give generously, and live gratefully. Plan for the future, and don’t try to keep up with others. But it will seem as if money will make you happy and solve all your problems. It doesn’t. The more you have, the more you want. If you get on that hamster wheel, the pursuit never ends, and it is hard to jump off.
Speaking of happiness, here is the secret: relationships - with God, others, and yourself. Cultivate a close relationship with God. You won’t always feel close to God, and there will be a lot of doubt along the way. But that is part of the journey. Try not to drift, but when you do, God will always welcome you back. Find and keep good friends. Surround yourself with people that are walking the same road you want to walk, and find a few people that are further along the way. You may need to cut some loose every once in a while, but don’t do life alone. Reaching out for help is a sign of wisdom and strength, not weakness. Finally, get to know yourself. Remember that you are handcrafted by God. Forget trying to be perfect. Learn, grow, and change. You are stronger than you think, and your low points are never your last points. There is always more to your story. Most of all, as you get to know yourself, be who you are. The world needs you.
Ok, that’s it for now. I am sure you want to get on with this day. Congratulations. Go do your thing and remember: you can always come home (but we may charge rent).
Peace,
Matt
Congratulations. This is a big moment, whether it feels like it or not. Big because it is a threshold from one stage of life to another. If you are feeling a little all over the place, that is ok. You are saying goodbye and hello at the same time. Grieving something ending, celebrating something accomplished, and processing the excitement, anxiety, and perhaps fear over what is coming up. It is a lot.
You have probably seen a lot of speeches going around on Snapchat or TikTok, like the one from the Kansas City Chiefs player telling women that their job is to stay home and have kids. There are a lot of people who think this way, not just about women, but about a lot of things. The world is always changing, and it can be scary and unsettling. Some deal with this by wishing they could go back in time to some earlier way of life. You might even be tempted at times to believe this, but I caution against it. The answers for your life don’t reside in the past but in the future. No one ever moved forward by going backwards. There is wisdom in old ideas, but you must figure out how to apply them to a new and changing world. Also, the past was not near as lovely as folks make it out to be. You can waste a lot of time resisting change. Instead, keep moving forward and engage the evolving world with courage, openness, and humility. Don’t be afraid.
You will discover if you haven’t already that a lot of people want to know what you are doing next. Your future plans matter, and I am proud of what you are working towards. But the most important part of life is not what you are going to do but who you are going to become. The answers to that question won’t be found in a classroom or a job promotion. You have to search differently for those answers, and find wise people to help you. This is the stuff Jesus cares most about, and he can help. Trust him and listen. The world will reduce your value to what you achieve, earn, and produce. Don’t buy into that idea. Life is about more than that.
When it comes to money, be careful here. You need it. Be smart. Save wisely, spend intentionally, give generously, and live gratefully. Plan for the future, and don’t try to keep up with others. But it will seem as if money will make you happy and solve all your problems. It doesn’t. The more you have, the more you want. If you get on that hamster wheel, the pursuit never ends, and it is hard to jump off.
Speaking of happiness, here is the secret: relationships - with God, others, and yourself. Cultivate a close relationship with God. You won’t always feel close to God, and there will be a lot of doubt along the way. But that is part of the journey. Try not to drift, but when you do, God will always welcome you back. Find and keep good friends. Surround yourself with people that are walking the same road you want to walk, and find a few people that are further along the way. You may need to cut some loose every once in a while, but don’t do life alone. Reaching out for help is a sign of wisdom and strength, not weakness. Finally, get to know yourself. Remember that you are handcrafted by God. Forget trying to be perfect. Learn, grow, and change. You are stronger than you think, and your low points are never your last points. There is always more to your story. Most of all, as you get to know yourself, be who you are. The world needs you.
Ok, that’s it for now. I am sure you want to get on with this day. Congratulations. Go do your thing and remember: you can always come home (but we may charge rent).
Peace,
Matt
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Archive
2025
January
Happy New Year // M-Note 1.4.2025Cancel the Noise // M-Note 1.11.25Cancel the Noise Discussion Guide - Part 1The Beloved Community // M-Note 01.18.2025Cancel the Noise Discussion Guide - Part 2What A Coincidence // M-Note 1.25.25Cancel the Noise Discussion Guide - Part 3Cancel the Noise Discussion Guide - Part 4The Original Influencer // M-Note 2.1.25
February
The Beloved Community Discussion Guide - Part 1Exploring New Sites…And You’re Invited // M-Note 2.8.25The Beloved Community Discussion Guide - Part 2Uncovering Implicit Bias // M-Note 2.15.2025A "Flurry" of Activity // M-Note 2.22.25The Beloved Community Discussion Guide - Part 3The Beloved Community Discussion Guide - Part 4
March
Beloved Community Action Steps // M-Note 3.1.25Vulnerability & Wilderness | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 1Trusting the Spirit's Lead | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 2Courageous Connection | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 3What's Your Emotional IQ? // M-Note 3.8.25The Spaces Between Us | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 4Emotional Rollercoaster Discussion Guide - Part 1Jesus Weeps With You | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 5When Sadness Lingers | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 6Lurking in the Shadows | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 7Cycles of Life and Death | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 8Inked in Memory | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 9The Void of Grief | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 10Sending Forth // M-Note 3.15.25Emotional Rollercoaster Discussion Guide - Part 2Journey Not Alone | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 11Friends Along the Way | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 12The Loneliness of Fear | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 13Not Through With You Yet | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 14Clinging to Hope | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 15Bring It To The King | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 16Pray When Unsteady | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 17Courage to Stand for Faith | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 18Emotional Rollercoaster Discussion Guide - Part 3A Holy Rage | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 19Focus on What is Holy | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 20Fast for Justice and Kindness | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 21The World is Harsh and Beautiful | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 22I Feel Sorry for Jesus | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 23Emotional Rollercoaster Discussion Guide - Part 4i flipped a table once | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 24Ain’t Got Nothin’ | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 25Spring Forward in Faith // M-Note 3.29.25Visio Divina | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 26Everlasting Joy Sealed in Your Heart | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 27
April
Sometimes Joy is Simply Doing Your Best | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 28An Unexpected Gift of Spring | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 29When Joy Flows Freely | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 30Easter Challenge // M-Note 4.5.25Joy Even When It Rains | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 31Emotional Rollercoaster Discussion Guide - Part 5Joy Entwined with Loss | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 32When Betrayal is Part of the Plan | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 33Healing From Disappointment | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 34Betraying Others is Betraying Yourself | 2025 Lenten Devotional | Day 35
2024
January
Clean Slate: Week 1 Discussion GuideStarting & Sustaining Change // M-Note 1.6.24Clean Slate: Week 2 Discussion GuideStarting Small, Dreaming Big // M-Note 1.13.24Clean Slate: Week 3 Discussion GuideTogether Towards Change...and Healthy Habits // M-Note 1.20.24Clean Slate: Week 4 Discussion GuideSlowing Down for God to Show Up // M-Note 1.27.24
February
More Isn't Always Better // M-Note 2.3.24Money Talks: Week 1 Discussion GuideAshes for Valentine's Day? // M-Note 2.10.24Money Talks: Week 2 Discussion GuideLenten Devotional 2024Money Talks: Week 3 Discussion GuideWhat's your legacy? // M-Note 2.17.24Strength in Numbers: Community in Ministry // M-Note 2.24.24Entourage Discussion Guide - Week One
March
Entourage Discussion Guide - Week TwoUpdates from Clayton and Easter Invitation // M-Note 3.2.24Twenty Students Confirmed Last Sunday // M-Note 3.9.24Entourage Discussion Guide - Week 3How serving at Easter can really make a difference // M-Note 3.16.24Entourage Discussion Guide - Week 4Can You Know Joy Without Pain? // M-Note 3.23.24Entourage Discussion Guide - Week 5It's time for EasterSTL at The Factory // M-Note 3.28.24
April
Easter Discussion GuideScreen Time: Troubleshooting our Relationship with Technology // M-Note 4.6.24Screen Time Discussion Guide - Week 1Springtime Reminders: Joy Comes with the Morning // M-Note 4.13.24Screen Time Discussion Guide - Week 2Shaping the Future at the UMC General Conference // M-Note 4.20.24Screen Time Discussion Guide - Week 3 General Conference Halftime Report// M-Note 4.27.24Screen Time Discussion Guide - Week 4
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